Exercise: Escaping the Dad Bod Jungle - A Humorous Guide to Motivation
"How do I motivate myself to exercise?"
Hi friend,
Need some help motivating yourself to exercise?
Here are my shoes. Put it on and walk in it. And I’ll lead you out of the same jungle of low motivation I was once lost in.
TOO BUSY? NO TIME?
You’re so swamped with work; you have no time to exercise.
Your boss was practically breathing down your neck, pressuring you to perform, or you would be fired. You’ve unintentionally mastered the art of intermittent fasting, skipping every meal from breakfast and lunch to dinner and supper just to get the job done.
You emerged from the ordeal victorious, but also looking like a gaunt, haggard zombie version of yourself. You fell ill. And as you lie in bed recuperating, you realize, “There has to be a better way to take care of my health.”
In case you’re wondering, that was me.
A PICTURE PAINTS A THOUSAND WORDS
You saw a photo of yourself and your 4-year-old daughter in swimsuits, playing in a shallow pool.
Your daughter was splashing around gleefully, while you were sitting beside her. Your gigantic whale of a Dad Bod belly was in stark contrast to her tiny frame.
You cringed and gasped at that photo
It was both hilarious and sobering!
You silently chastised yourself, “I’ve got to do something about this!”
That was me in the picture.
WORDS SING A LOUDER PICTURE STILL
Your wife tactfully remarks, “Your back looks better than your front!”
Your gym instructor bluntly declares, “That’s a beer belly!”, implying you’ve been drinking, which you know you’re NOT. Not for a long time anyway. Wink.
Your dad tried to make light of it, saying “This is your personal property. It’s your treasure.”
The subtle and not-so-subtle jabs fueled your determination. You've had enough! It's time for a change!
TROUBLE IN THE GYM
You join a gym, knowing full well that trouble awaits.
You’re sweating buckets and grunting like an ogre over the first few squats, lunges, and crunches.
You keep quiet. But one of your gym buddies were moaning out loud what you’re hissing beneath your breath: “What is the point of all this suffering?! I feel like quiting!”
You chuckled and pressed on.
The next day, your body was aching all over the place.
But strangely, you were immensely satisfied that you’d made it through.
And you were looking forward to the next session.
EXPLOSIVE SECRETS REVEALED
Then you started to learn new things.
You learn that muscles burn more calories than fat.
That’s right. Building muscles helps you burn fat faster.
Armed with the new knowledge, you start bench pressing with renewed vigor.
Your goal is clear: Building muscles, burn fat.
Then you discovered the AFTERBURN EFFECT.
This means your muscles continue to burn calories long after your workout ends. You could be chilling on your couch sipping iced tea, long after the exercise, and your calories keep on burning still.
This is way better than your cardio running around the neighborhood. (Apologies to the cardio fans out there)
You’re even more stoked to get back to the gym and pump those irons.
THE RUBBER MEETS THE ROAD
Slowly but surely, results started to show.
The flab starts to melt away. The muscles start to define. And the compliments start to roll in.
Your wife notices your chiseled abs. She can’t keep her hands off your tight glutes.
She squeezes them during your sleep.
Your teenage daughter started to take notice too. She exclaims, “Pa, you’ve lost weight!”
Your ego is so inflated, you could float away.
Your V-shape physique is so prominent, you look like a Hot Dad now.
You couldn’t stop going to the gym. Even if you want to, your body won’t let you.
While your gym buddies are busy taking selfies of themselves, they are secretly admiring you too.
You feel like a champion!
OUT OF THE JUNGLE AND INTO THE LIGHT
Are you motivated now?
Can I have my shoes back? wink wink.
Visit » Strength training: Sculpt a physique that commands attention, not pity! You will find what you need.
Faithfully Yours, Gary
Subscribe to my newsletters for free firsthand tips on health and fitness: Fit40Strong's tips!
OR Check out my blog for MORE TIPS ON MOTIVATING YOURSELF BACK TO THE GYM!
Comments
Post a Comment